What Are You MOST Afraid of?

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What do you think it might be that stops you from having what you want?

 It is not outside forces, conditions, environments or other people. It may seem that it is, but I promise you it is not. 

 I talk with wonderful women who are unhappy, stuck and even know what they want to do or have but they can’t move forward even when the solution is clear and available. Why is that?

 It’s not lack of money or time which are the two favorite means we use to stop ourselves. I know this because I’ve used them myself. Think for a moment of something you just HAD to have. The desire was so strong! Probably a material item or something for your kids or another loved one, or friend. You made it happen! You somehow found the money or made the time available. 

 The urge to ‘give’ and ‘nurture’ is very strong for women, it’s in our nature. But when it comes to giving and nurturing ourselves we put on the brakes. Desire and Deserving aren’t in the same sentence when it comes to ourselves. Why?

 Sometimes it’s a feeling that if we aren’t sacrificing something we aren’t deserving. So we sacrifice what we want for whatever convenient reason we can come up with in order to ‘feel’ more deserving, but we still don’t get what we want. There is a danger here of becoming a martyr and that’s fatal for all relationships especially the one with yourself. I watched a loved one do this to herself and how miserable her life became as a result.

 It’s important to know you don’t do this consciously, it’s usually unconscious. 

 Yes, there IS the Universal Law of Sacrifice, and this is actually what it means:‘”To give up something of a lower nature in order to gain something of a higher nature.” This could mean giving up some TV time to read a self help book. It could mean putting your money on an educational course or coaching or a monthly massage instead of magazines, dining out, daily Starbucks, etc. It does not mean that you give at the expense of yourself & become an empty shell.

 So, the Law of Sacrifice shows you that you can have what you want without becoming a martyr and strong desire shows you just what you can achieve. But there is one more thing…..

 We women are actually fearful of getting what we want because WE ARE AFRAID OF OUR REAL POWER and often don’t know what to do with it. So we play small and don’t invest in ourselves with money or time. And we unconsciously find the ways to remain playing small.

 Hear this: The Universe is much more excited to give you an amazing life; a successful business, loving relationship, glowing health, not just a small profit, a so-so relationship or partial good health. You were sent here to experience success in all things.

 When you step into the way the how appears. There is no other time than now. The past is to learn from and the future is for you to mold. You can’t worry about the time.

 What you should do:

 1. Know that thoughts of lack, excuses and manipulation will stop the flow. 

 2. Money is just energy, it needs to circulate, once you begin hoarding, the flow stops. This does not mean you become irresponsible with money, but you must keep it circulating. You control your money, it does not control you. If you do not ‘invest’ in yourself, you will gain no ‘interest’. You cannot grow. Make better choices with your money, don’t hoard it out of fear of losing it. Money is always replaceable, your life isn’t. Growing does require some risk, but make it a calculated, wise risk.

 3. Likewise your time. You plan it and you control it, but it will take a bit of concentrated time to schedule how you spend it. And then stick to it.

 4. If you feel stuck for the right answer, know that it is within you not outside of you. Do this: Ground yourself in a sitting position and picture a golden light above your head that descends and provides a circle of light surrounding your body. Stop your mind from trying to control everything, relax and breathe as you go into that deep place inside of you, the place where the Universe lives in all of us. Ask your question such as “What is coming up for me now?” “Where it it coming from?” “What path should I follow?” etc. And then quietly listen for the answer. 

 Just ask. Not from a place of fear, not from a place of trying to control the answer and just accept what comes, even if it seems impossible. Nothing is impossible. Look at the word: “I’m-possible”. 

 If you know what you want then just ask for it as you visualize yourself having already received it.

 Your assignment:

 Do the above exercise every day for seven days and write down the results. I’d love it if you would email them to me if you are comfortable doing so!

 By Lynn Moore CAC

(c) Lynn Moore 2011      
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“Goal” is a Word I DON’T Like”

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From someone whose entire business is centered around helping clients reach goals and get what they want, I’ll bet this is something you would never expect to hear! Right?

 

Well, it’s not so much ‘the word’ as what the word portrays in the ‘old world’ connotation. I firmly believe that the old standard of Goal setting and achievement is predominantly left brained and has outlived its usefulness.  It no longer works in this new age of enlightenment, especially for women.

 

For many people who have maybe dabbled in the world of ‘setting goals’ and not had success, or those for whom the process is far too left brained, or those who see it as another ‘thing’ to add to their already too long To Do list, it has a reputation of either ‘doesn’t work’, is dull and boring or is a struggle they just don’t need and takes up too much time.  

 

It took me years of: 

  • Knowing something was not ‘right’ with this process
  • Searching continuously for the missing link
  • A trip to Nepal, and then
  • Months of peeling down to the core of what would become the New Way in a New Age of the ‘goaling’ system.

Now I no longer teach ‘setting’ and ‘achieving’ goals. I teach you to go ‘goaling’.  You wouldn’t think changing from a noun to a verb could make such a difference!

 

GOAL: (noun) static, immobile, serious, head work, analytic, reminds me of how hard athletes have to work to score a ‘goal’, possible injuries, 

 

SETTING A GOAL: The above is now ‘set’ in hardening concrete!

 

GOALING: (verb), fluid, movement, flow, flexibility, heart work, creativity, reminds me of a stream, gurgling happily as it meanders it’s way to it’s destination

 

What You Need to Do:

 

1. Think ‘attract’, not ‘go after’

2. Think ‘choose and connect’ rather than ‘set and achieve’

3. Think ‘align’ not ‘struggle to reach’

4. Think ‘now’ not ‘when’

5. Think ‘oneness’, not ‘separateness’

6. Think ‘creativity’, not ‘logic’

7. Think ‘give’ not ‘get’

8. Think ‘energies’ not ‘rules’

 

Just as the stream aligns with it’s banks to guide it to it’s destination, so you have your ‘banks’ to guide you.  They are called Universal Principles or Laws. Align with them just as the stream aligns with it’s ‘guidance’ and you too can connect with your destination and have fun ‘gurglng’ along the way!

 

Often we hear “it’s not about the goal, it about who we become in the process’. It’s all about the journey!  So why not truly enjoy the journey?

 

The entire ‘Inspirational Goaling’ system is taught in the book “Inspirational Goaling” and in the 5 CD & Action Book Set “How To Get What You Want Every Time”

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What Does Happiness Look Like?

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by Lynn Moore CAC

Many people have a fear of emotions, especially those of a negative nature such as anxiety, hate, anger, jealousy, shame, guilt, rejection etc. and in order to keep them at bay we live in a state of avoiding any behavior that could result in experiencing them.  After all, we don’t wake up in the morning saying ”I think I’d like to have a little anger today”!

We would love to just feel the emotions of ‘happiness’: fulfillment, peacefulness, contentment, pleasure, joy, cheer, bliss, exultation, ecstasy, delight, and so forth.  What we don’t realize is that in shutting down one type of emotion, we also shut down all types of emotion.  Therefore the positive emotions we desire are elusive and we find ourselves in a state of unhappiness; just what we didn’t want.

What we fear, we create.

In my position as a coach helping people choose and connect with their goals, I am invariably and often asking, “What do you want?” The answer most often delivered is, “To be happy.”

They’ve even made a movie about it called ‘Happy”. Look at the trailer to see an example of exactly what I just said in the previous paragraph:

http://youtu.be/JcMQmuvzPmI

This, in turn, leads me to ask,  “Define happiness” or “What does happiness look like to you?”

Because happiness is a state of mind, not an emotion, the way to happiness is to discover what you need to be, do or have that will bring you to a state of happiness.

What you need to do:

First: Embrace all emotion.  Every emotion has value and lessons to teach us. Often the ‘negative’ emotion we want most to avoid is the one we truly need to embrace.  For example if you are hiding from ‘shame’, what is it about ‘pride’ that scares you?

Second:  Never fear emotions. You are not powerless over them. We are creatures of feelings and if you have followed my teachings you will know that it is our thoughts that create our feelings and we can choose our thoughts.

Third: In order to find that state of happiness, ask yourself, “What do I need to BE? What do I need to DO?  What do I need to HAVE?” and make your answers ‘feelings’.

For example: I need to BE joyful. Now ask yourself what is making you sad.  Examine it, embrace it, let it go and create a new thought about it.

And: I need to DO something to help me feel fulfilled. Now ask yourself what is making you feel frustrated. Examine it, embrace it, let it go and create a new thought about it.

And: I need to HAVE bliss.  Now ask yourself what is making you miserable. Examine it, embrace it, let it go and create a new thought about it.

Of course, this sounds pretty simplistic, but we do often tend to make our challenges more involved and difficult than they need to be.  If you want to create a state of happiness as your goal, it can truly be as simple as acknowledging your true feelings, embracing them as okay because you are human, letting them go because you can, and creating a new thought surrounding the emotion you want to BE, DO or HAVE.   You cannot entertain both negative and positive emotions at the same time.   Choose the positive!

If you want help with the above, ‘choose’ to take advantage of my “Complimentary 30 Minute Goal Strategy Session” by booking it here:

http://clear-goals-coaching.genbook.com/?bookingSourceId=1

(c)Lynn Moore 2011 

 

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The Woman in the Mirror

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by Lynn Moore CAC 

 

We know ourselves best

 Wrong 

We may spend 24/7/365 trapped in our one head and body from first breath to last, but that’s the problem. It’s like trying to see the mural on the wall when you have your nose pressed against it.

 

Oh we know what we like and dislike, but when it comes to being stuck, making decisions, struggling with health, relationships, careers, money, habits, etc. we really don’t know who we truly are, and in fact become masters of denial.

 Some of us have done lots of reading, seen psychologists, taken courses, are very well educated and we’ve made the self help industry very busy. This does help, but truly, how many people do all that? And does it make us perfectly happy human beings when we do?

I can say this from experience as a Life Coach with a specialty in working with the goals of women in their mid-life and later years. Even these women who have gained lots of life wisdom over decades are struggling to know themselves on several levels. They hear the clock ticking and realize that they have more past than they have future and feel an urge to really come into their own, contribute in a different way, leave their unique footprint and a legacy to be remembered. But don’t know where to begin or make several starts only to realize that path isn’t the right one for them.

 You don’t HAVE to be a woman or in mid life to feel this way, but it’s VERY common in this group in particular

 So we think, “Ah-ha, I’ll set some goals, that’ll work!” Nope. Why not?

 First clue is when asked what we want the most common answer is, “I don’t know.” So we set a goal or two for something we ‘think’ will be ‘it’. Usually we don’t meet the goal or if we do it hasn’t done what we expected. No wonder goal setting gets a bad rap!

 Question: How do you get to knowing what you want? Know a goal is the right goal for you? What do you measure it against?  

 Answer: Know who you truly are. Get extreme clarity!

 FOR YOU TO DO:

 You came here with a specific ‘gift’ to share often called a Life Purpose. Do whatever it takes to discover it. You will need outside help.

 Take a ‘Personality” test.

 Take a Right Brain/Left Brain ratio test.

 Do an exercise that will help you define your highest values

 Discover your top most personal ethics and boundaries

 Study the Universal Principles as in “The 11 Forgotten Laws”

http://www.the11forgottenlaws.com/?p=73

 Align your goals with all of the above. 

 I know, that seems like a real basketful, but if you truly want to change things, you must meet the ”Woman in the Mirror” and get to love her.

 Keep on Goaling!

 (c) Lynn Moore 2011

For help with the above ‘to do’ list you can find it here:

http://www.getwhatyouwanteverytime.com/gwywet-cd-set

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